Some days your looking takes you into past stories, events or just making certain you are able to enter the freeway safely. So what is it you see when you are looking? Are you seeing what is all around you at any given moment or is what you are seeing, as you look around, filtered by moments that deeply touched you in your life. And are you aware of when these times of multiplicity are with you? A very dear woman I know and love, is in the process of dying. I realized that all I am looking at, since receiving the news of her inevitable passing has changed my seeing. I am seeing all that is around me with increased newness and awe. My hello's and goodbyes have a different tone and sensibility. Even the colors of things seem fresher and more alive. I am someone who always appreciates looking and really seeing what is actually around me whether I am sighting a Bald Eagle or a dilapidated building. There is a wealth of story in everything. My stories change when I am close to death. I can feel a part of me withdraw internally. And yet my senses seem to heighten. The presence of immortality, death enters the room as it had during conception, implantation, birth and other events in our lives. So no wonder when we are brought close to this events our looking and seeing change. We have survived and are grateful to be with every living portion of life. Still there is this sadness that permeates inside and out of you every now and then. And, oh yea, it's time to get on with things in my day. Better snap out of the filters and see what I am looking at in this moment. PINK SHOES. I see them clearly now.
I was once again taken into a place of deep meditation and wonderment of "becoming" as I played in Mother Ocean. As I gave myself to the currents I began a journey I think, we are all familiar and experience often. One of trust. I sensed at first, as though the strength of Her waves and currents would over power me, but as I gave more and more of myself over to the movements of the water and began trusting in my innate knowing I do float, I noticed a shift in my entire being. My body began loosening. I felt my entire body as fluid and my skin the container holding me together. A sense of joy and playfulness took over. I could feel myself smiling and even giggling at times. I would lay down in shallow water inviting the pulls and push of the ocean to move my body and spirit wherever it'd like. I became delighted with the sensations that rushed threw me. I floated out further from shore and began diving into the bottom of the waves just before they tumbled over me and I found a momentary stillness. I was neither moving down, up or sideways. Each stillness seemed to reach deeper into my heart. Play, playing with nature, another person or alone. The "how" we play is not important the act of playing is what is important. It brings us into present time and the act of living spontaneously by improvisation. One could even look at play as being a dance with the "unknown". "Cast your fate to the wind". Try it, it feels good, revitalizing, and inspiring. Enjoy.
This morning I offer a counter image to what we have been experiencing in the Media, a still, quite and beautiful image that seems to speak volumes about wholeness as well as thriving and dying, a continuum we all feel over and over in our lives. Those moments of transition into becoming something else.
Today brings thoughts of passings. What passes before our eyes, what do we see, sense and feel during a day?
Or do we? Are we in relationship? Do we want to be in relationship?
How do you come into relationship?
How do you know you are in relationship?
How do you continue to be in relationship?
Thank you Hawk for the inquiry.
Dedicated to my Aunt Miriam.
I am a Body Therapist drawn to the mysteries of conscious awareness that lives inside and outside of our bodies; the fabric of all living things and their connectedness.